Signs You Need To Let A Relationship Go
There lies a point in every Christian’s life where he/she will have to let go of someone that we have once held dear to their hearts. For some, it may be a best friend. For others, it may be a significant other, or maybe even a family member. This is because once we become born again believers we start a process where we slowly begin to shed off unhealthy parts of our old selves and our old lives which include some of the people we used to hang out with before we came to know God.
It is never an easy thing to face but as you get closer to God you will notice certain people as hindering blocks or distractions from Him. Letting go of a person has nothing to do with thinking you are better than them or feeling that since you have Christ you are too good to hang out with them. Letting a person go is all about protecting your walk with God and removing any dead weight that prevents you from flying to your unique destiny. Here are a few tips on how to recognize the signs that it may be time to finally let go of that relationship that you’ve been straining to hold on to.
They keep reminding you of your past. They may be doing it intentionally or unintentionally but either way, it is still dangerous to spiritual growth and progression. Salvation is a decision that must be made daily but when we are so easily reminded of our past it is so easy to slip back into old habits, lifestyles, and ungodly relationships from the past so sometimes it is best to sever all relational ties that may draw us back to a lifestyle of sin.
They condemn you about your past or process with words like, “Yeah Right, You’re a Christian now? Didn’t you use to be at the club like every Saturday?” or, “If you’re really a Christian why do you still do this, why aren’t you doing that?” It is not God’s will for any of his children to carry guilt, shame, or condemnation so anyone who taunts you about your past mistakes or your slip-ups should not have a prominent place in your life.
They make you feel bad. Some may call it vibes, or energy but regardless what you call it, the truth is a person’s spirit is alive. Hanging out with someone who has “bad vibes”, or a bad spirit can start to take a toll on you mentally, and emotionally, but also spiritually. It may be because they are always negative, complain a lot, continually point out your flaws, or a number of other things. If after hanging out with a person you feel drained, depressed, down, or annoyed, that is a subtle but clear indication it is time to cut that relationship out of your life. Our peace and happiness is an important thing that we should be selfishly protective of.
They pressure you to sin. Sometimes this is done unbeknownst to them but a person walking in darkness only knows how to operate in darkness. When a person is not in the light sin is second nature to them whether they can recognize their habits as sin or not. They may invite you out clubbing or to a party, encourage you to gossip, try to pressure you into hooking up with someone, or anything else in between. It gets hard to say no to each and every invite so sometimes it is just best to cut out the temptation from your life completely.
They act as a distraction– sometimes it has nothing to do with the person themselves but has everything to do with how we esteem such person. Sometimes we find ourselves so in love with a person that we will do anything for them even if that means skipping church to be with them, breaking one of God’s law to please them, or maybe even neglecting the presence of God in order to be in their presence instead. We must be careful not to put anyone before God because to Him that is seen as idol-worshipping and the bible clearly states that we should not have any gods before him, this includes other people. It may be enough to simply limit the time with a person but if the attachment is too strong it may be necessary to cut it out altogether and “Choose ye today whom you will serve.”
They don’t respect you- It’s easy to recognize who holds respect for us and our Christian walk. If you’ve communicated to them your pursuits in living holy and they still bring do or talk about certain ungodly things around you then that is not someone who you should want to be around. There are certain things that people wouldn’t dare do or say around a pastor, their parents, or a law enforcer because they respect their respective title, position, and morals. Likewise, the people in your life should always respect your title, position, and morals as a Christian. They may not be willing to change their lifestyle for you but they should at least have the respect in supporting you to change yours! Cursing around you, doing drugs around you, or even bragging to you about their sin and ungodly lifestyle are all forms of disrespect you should not tolerate.
Of course you love these people that God may be asking you to cut out of your life. You may even be weary of cutting them off thinking that if you don’t hang out with them then how can they ever come to know God. The best thing you can do is love them from afar and continue to pray that God will send someone to talk to them about Salvation because remember we don’t save people, only God does.