Self-Confidence vs. God Confidence
Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, Snap Chat, and host of other social media sites have worked to corrupt the true meaning of beauty and self-worth. It appears that everyone has the “perfect” body, hair, family, relationship, and children. Beauty is being defined by likes and followers and sadly, there is this constant fixation that we must keep up with everyone’s “hashtag goals” just to stay relevant. If you are not careful scrolling through other people’s highlight reel, social media can start to negatively influence how you view your own self-esteem and confidence.
Looking to others to validate my self-confidence and self-worth was indeed a struggle for me. It seemed like no matter what I did, someone was always doing it better. I just didn’t seem to measure up. I wondered what was I doing wrong and why wasn’t I getting noticed like others. I eventually learned that my self-esteem was being measured by the wrong standards which led me to want to dig deeper into confidence and how do you get it.
What exactly is self-confidence? According to Merriam Webster Dictionary self-confidence is defined as, “confidence in oneself and in one’s power and abilities. The issue with this is that according to this definition, confidence is solely produced by our own ability and powers. Having self-confidence is great, however, when you are solely relying on “self” to produce it, you are extremely limited.
What happens when you enter a season or place in your life where you start to feel powerless and do not trust in your own abilities? Yep! You guessed it, your self-confidence starts to waver and doubt begins to enter your mind. You may even contemplate giving up and start to entertain negative thoughts such as,
I am not worthy…
I am not good enough…
I am not smart enough …
I am not pretty enough…
Entertaining negative thoughts will block out the truth. The truth is, you cannot do anything in your own strength but, when you take your own ability and couple it with Christ you now have what is call God-fidence. All the things you cannot do in your own ability and power, now with God-fidence you can do in Christ!
God-fidence, is confidence in Christ’s power and ability to work in and through you. When you have Christ, social media or the world is no longer the standard, God and his righteousness is. Christ becomes the barometer of your worth.
Whenever you start to have negative thoughts about your worth or your ability, the lie needs to be combated with God’s word-the truth. Here are some Godfidence Builders:
Negative Thoughts vs. Gofidence Thoughts
I can’t do anything I can do all things through Christ that strengthens—Philippians 4:13
I am not enough I am more than a conqueror”—Romans 8:31-39
I am not pretty I am fearfully and wonderfully made”— Psalms 139:14
I am weak God’s strength is perfected in my weakness”—2 Corinthians 12:9
I have no purpose For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord”—-Jeremiah 29:11
Apart from changing your thoughts, there are four other main traps to avoid that could hinder you from building your God-fidence:
- The Comparison Trap
- The Idol Trap
- The Devalue Trap
- The Negative Talk Trap
The Comparison Trap
When you start comparing yourself to others, it is right at that very moment you diminish your confidence and start feeding into the lie that “you are not enough.” There is always going to be someone smarter, prettier, taller, or faster than you but you have everything you need in order to reach your calling and purpose. Remember, our own abilities and strength is not what gives us God-fidence, Christ does. Look to Him to find your worth not to others. It’s not about who can do it better, but it’s about who can live up to their destiny. God created you strategically in order to impact a certain group of people which means everything about you from the way you look, down to the way you talk was done by God on purpose. The individuals you are called to influence are depending on you to be you, not a cheap carbon copy of someone else so it is important to stop comparing yourself to others and just be you.
There is a thin line between admiring and idolizing. There is nothing wrong with admiring people and their work. The issue lies when you start to idolize them. God is a jealous God. He even said that no man should serve 2 masters. Christ should have the first position in your life. He should be the one that guides your decisions, choices, and actions. If another individual takes that position you will remove Christ from His rightful position in your life which will also mean His power will also be removed from working in and through you. Hang on to your God-fidence, by keeping God first and making Christ your priority.
Value and worth play a critical role in your God-fidence. If you idolize and compare yourself to others you will have a hard time valuing your own self-worth. God created you and said that you were good. He even said that you are fearfully and wonderfully made. This means you do not need to look to others to approve your worth. The only person that you need to look to validate your Godfidence is Christ.
Negative Self Talk Trap
Words are powerful. Life and death are in the power of the tongue. The language you elect to speak does have a direct correlation to your Godfidence. Therefore, be mindful of the words, you speak over yourself. Change every negative speech into something positive so that your words will build your confidence and not tear it down.
Avoid these traps and look to build your God-fidence. How do you build it? The more and more time you spend with the Lord the more and more you build it. Allow God to be part of the everyday rhythms of your life. Take time to read your word and find more scriptures to combat any negative thought. Spend quality time with the Lord in worship. When you build your relationship with Christ you also build your God-fidence!